Great change brings great chaos

Beginning with a hectic week of finals, packing, and good-byes; to a 3 day road trip through the mountains of Colorado, the towers of red rocks in Utah, the desert of Nevada; to finally reaching the promise land of Northern California.  The land that is full of life, rivers, creeks, winding roads through dense, green forests and the monsterous Red Woods .  The place my soul has been wandering, lost, awaiting my return.  Tonight, after a long week, exhausted after a long road trip filled with incredible experiences, and with no time wasted; day of work, I can finally relax.  I can let my mind settle and digest the chaos.  Chaotic as it has been, the feeling of freedom and happiness has pushed the feeling of chaos aside.

As Cody plays guitar and I put my thoughts down into words, I think of the feeling as I drove away from the place I have called home for my life in search of freedom.  The feeling of freedom I have felt since that moment.  I think back to the morning in Utah, waking to the unknown world of the night to find us in the middle of monuments of stacked red rocks on the outskirt of Moab.  The rocks that are stacked so perfectly and stand strong like castles.  I think of kayaking my first river in my own boat.  I can feel how it felt when I successfully rolled up-right after my first flip.  How the last stretch before reaching my new home felt.  The overwhelming feeling of freedom, happiness, and the unknown.  The day didn’t slow as we worked while the sun beat down on our exhausted bodies.  The farm has been hard at work nourishing the plants that have grown tall and strong that were once the babies that I had transplanted.  The apple trees, that just a few short weeks ago were covered with beautiful blossoms, are now covered in baby apples.  The baby chickens have grown from the puffy balls they once were.  The greenhouse continues to get greener and full of life.  Everything has changed but the feeling of this magical place has not.  I am exhausted but look forward to the new day ahead tomorrow.

But now, it is time to relax.  It is time to enjoy where I am right this moment.  This great change has indeed brought great chaos but I am confident the overflow of happiness and excitement will continue to mask the feeling of chaos.

PC: Kaylan Miller

The baby apples and the growing tomato plants

One week until freedom

One week.  One week until we begin our life unbound together.  One week until we start road tripping to Cali.  One week until I make the biggest move of my life.

I never felt this day would come.  I have been dreaming of this for months now.  I have imagined it over and over again.  It felt like the time would never pass, now I am only one week away.  I am overflowing with emotions.  To say I’m not a little nervous would be a lie.  Of course I am nervous.  My life will be completely different in only 7 days.  I will say good-bye to my parents for who knows how long.  I will leave the state I have called home for almost 19 years.  I will part from a friend who I have been inseparable from since pre-school, who I also shared my freshman year of college as my roommate.  I will leave behind everything I have known for 18 years.

But more than nervous I am bursting with joy and excitement.  I feel as if I am being reborn, like my life is just about to begin.  I can taste freedom.  I will be spending everyday with the man I love most.  I will see places and do things I never would have done without taking this leap.  I will meet people and build relationships that will bring opportunities I could not imagine now.  I will learn more than I ever have in any classroom.  I will find myself.  I will grow as a person and expand my consciousness more than ever.  I will give up all I have ever known for adventure.  I will trade structure for freedom.  My soul will be free to roam.

I am ready for this adventure.  Ready for change.  I only have one more week until the biggest, most exciting change of my life.

So, how I am supposed to study for finals?

Change is coming

Here I am, getting ready to head back to school for the week after a weekend of hiking, cooking, and time spent with good people.  I know this week will be no different than any week at school where I go to class and work, go for a run, and eat shitty food.

But change is coming.  In two short weeks I will be on my way to California.  On my way to living a truly unbound life.  I will leave Colorado, where I have called home for almost 19 years.  I will leave behind the majestic, snow-capped mountains, open plains, and rivers winding deep through the mounatins, for towering redwoods, rolling hills of lush green trees, dark forests, rivers and creeks that reach the ocean, and the cold coasts of Norther California.  I will be on the farm, the most magical place I have ever been.  I will be dancing with the buzzing bees, singing to the baby plants, and freeing my soul to roam as free as the birds roam the sky.  I will have the opportunity to learn to kayak with incredbile people on beautiful rivers.  I will be in a place to thrive and grow.  I will be surrounded by honest, true people.  I will be learning more everyday than I ever have in a classroom.  I will truly begin my life unbound.

With all change, comes chaos.  Chaos from finals, packing all my belongings, saying good-bye for now, to friends and family.  I’m not sure what lies ahead for me, but I will continue to embrace the change; therefore, the chaos.

PC: Cody Connell     Duo-kayaking the Royal Gorge of the Arkansas River,  COP1050961

PC: Kaylan Miller     Cañon City, CO20150812_195154

PC: Kaylan Miller       Pauley Creek, CA20151222_145903.jpg

PC: Cody Connell          Trinidad Beach, CA20151216_152725.jpg

PC: Kaylan Miller       Redwood Forest, Redway, CA20151216_114236.jpg